chocolate mousse

that chocolate mousse
so rich and flavorful
just one taste
and i feel it through my whole body
from my finger tips
down through my toes
one spoonful
makes my eyes roll to the back of my head
and sends shivers through my spine
other desserts can be too sweet for my pallet
a reek havoc on my hips
but not that chocolate mousse
it makes my mouth moist at the thought of it
i could eat bowls and bowls
and it still would not be enough to satisfy my appetite
i can't get enough of the smell and the way and the way it feels
and the taste
mmmmm the taste
no other treats can stand up to
that chocolate mousse...

dear old friend pt 3

dear old friend

what is this road you have led me down?

i thought i was ready

and would be more prepared this time around

but dear old friend

i feel lost and as clueless as ever

everything i thought i knew

i have forgotten

the cool and confident me seems to have flown out the window

dear old friend how is that i feel 16 again?

with you holding my hand

i know that i can get all that i've wanted

but dear old friend

i am scared and i can't think straight

i get nervous

and butterflies live in my stomach

dear old friend you have some explaining to do

fear, self-doubt, & nerves...

when fear takes over

it sometimes makes me wish

that i had a shovel

i would take all of the feelings

lock them in a box

and bury them deep

when self-doubt takes up residence

it makes me want to go look for an eraser

so that i can erase all of the words

never to let them see the light of day

when my nerves get the best of me

they make me rethink my decisions

and second guess myself

fear, self-doubt, and nerves

make me question my choices

and wonder if i put too much out there

too soon

they force me to try

and not to think about the future

because i can barely deal with my choices

today

every one

every one slower and longer than the other
feeling like i'm inhaling a piece of him with every one
while trying to capture every moment
and stretch out every minute
mentally photograph every second
so that i won't forget
this time, this place, these feelings
because i know
all i have to do is blink and it'll be gone
only to become a memory
every one slower and longer than the other
feeling like i'm inhaling a piece of him with every one
taking my time
because i knew he did not belong to me
and was not mine to keep
but with every one
i was able to hold on
and linger
in what would become a future memory...

carpe diem

sometimes in life
what you really want
and
what you really need
are one in the same.
no matter how much your try to fight it
no matter how much you try to replace it
the truth is,
only that one thing can give you
the fix that you need
and when you realize that
then it's time to face your biggest obstacle,
yourself.
you have to
cut the self doubt
remove the what ifs
and sometimes even put the future on the back burner
by just going for it and
living in the moment.
speak your mind
and seize the day
because you will wake up and realize
that you had what what you wanted
and what you needed
right at your finger tips, but
because of your own shadow,
the moment to grab hold has passed
never to captured again...

new is still the same

new day

new year

new choices

new decisions

same situations

same problems

stuck fixing what was placed on the back burner

and put off for tomorrow

different time

same people

same issues

time to take hold

and make some changes

because it's

a new day

and a new year

and somewhere out there

are new solutions