2010

2010
The “even” year
Allegedly it was supposed to be everyone’s year
This is my year I’m claiming it
Was all I heard on January 1st
Five days into May
Exactly one month away from my 27th birthday
And I think that the sun finally might showing up
For my 2010
It has been a hard year
And I have been in a dark place
Unhappy, alone, claustrophobic,
trapped, confused, unattractive, lost, depressed…
That is what my 2010 has been like so far
My heart, oh goodness my heart
It has heart and ached this year
After realizing that it is not as free of him as I thought
Even after all this time
It drives me crazy
And I don’t understand why
My heart wants someone
Who does not want me the same way
Why it won’t allow me to get close to someone else
It honestly makes a me a little sad
To pretend that I am fine with being “just friends”
My life
I have no clue when it stopped being my own
And I started going through the motions
Playing a role
Doing what I had to do
So I would not have to answer questions
Waking up just so I can go back to sleep again
Some 2010 this has been
When you’re down
There is only one way to go….